Skinny Bitch.

Pet Peeve:

When you sit down while wearing a skirt. Ass-to-chair.

7:58 am…

I’m feeling irritable and you’re being irritating. Not a good mix.

"This isn’t a 6."

Lady, you aren’t a 6.

Long weekend summed up:

I learned that Elijah Wood was the kid in Flipper, and nearly died hiking.

By hiking, apparently I meant rock climbing.

These are from the Moose Horn trail.

And Laverty Falls…

I love Fundy.

Also, I had a dream that my gums would not stop bleeding.

There’s nothing better…

Than when the hairdresser washes your hair. Fucking magical.

Pet Peeve:

Weak handshakes.

… Man up.

Eeeeeeeeeek.

I GOT MY NEW CAR TODAY!

That is all.

"I have a lot of salava in my mouth."

Mother dearest. She meant saliva.

I guess you can’t always depend on Depends…

So yesterday afternoon, I’m working on the floor and see one of my managers walking towards me mouthing something about pants. Finally she gets close enough that I can hear her. “Why isn’t she wearing any pants!?”

I walk around a rack and see a little old lady wearing a long sleeve top and a vest. No pants. Thankfully her top was just long enough to hide what we later found out was a dirty diaper.

One of our associates was nice enough (shit, I couldn’t have done it) to approach her and ask if she was okay. She told her that she had an accident in the next store over, and had thrown her pants out in the garbage outside. So she’s looking for a pair of pants, the associate is helping her while trying to keep her somewhat hidden from EVERYONE IN THE STORE NOTICING. They find her a pair of yoga pants to wear while she searches for something else.

So instead of calling the RCMP and having her removed from the store for indecent exposure, they were nice enough to give her free pants. What does she do? She complains about the service, and asks for the phone number to call Home Office and file a complaint.

Real. Nice.

UPDATE:

This whole poopy ordeal happened on a Friday afternoon. I had the weekend off. Came in Monday morning and when i went into the washrooms, I could smell poo. Horribly smelly poo. I knew it was there somewhere, but I couldn’t find it. Finally I realized it had to be in the sanitary dispenser thingy in the third stall. I assumed from the smell, that some asshole had put their baby’s dirty diaper in it. So, anyway, I tell my boss.

A few minutes later we head into the washroom, him armed with rubber gloves, me with plastic bags. The store had only been open for about 10 minutes at this point, and already a lady had been in and taken a dump. (Really? Did you plan this? Visit a store as soon as they open so you can have private poopoo time? Just shit at home!) So of course, the bathroom reeks 10X worse now.

He opens up the bin in the third stall, hauls out the bag, and VOILA! Mrs. Poopypants’ filthy doody-filled undies! They weren’t Depends after all.

Yup. She stuffed her shitty undies into the tampon/pad disposal bin. Yuck.

Also, the manager from the store where she initially had the… Accident… Said that she took her pants off in their washroom and that she had wrapped toilet paper around her bottom. That’s what we had mistaken for a diaper. She mummified her ass with toilet paper. Worse yet, she walked out like that and continued to shop.

… I don’t understand people.